My New Year - Of Return
Yesssss. It’s about time I tell you all about the time I flew across the world and ended up at home! So, I know January is almost over HOWEVER, my new year starts on my birthday and GUESS WHAT DAY IT IS?
Ancestry and Ties
Around 2015, while getting my hair done, I noticed that my friend would be watching Nollywood movies. After this occurrence, the internet turned me on to a show called An African City. It was around this time that I became FASCINATED with getting to Ghana.
Last year, I invested in 23andMe + the health kit to try and get some answers about specific genetic diseases while also attempting to prevent an early death of natural causes. What I found was that not only was I mistaken by a lot of what I knew about my family’s history but that I was a whopping 84% “Sub-Saharan African”, with a majority split between Nigerian and Ghanian. Read about that here.
January 2019, at the initiation of the Year of Return, I saw a few college classmates kick off the celebration via social media. I knew instantly that this was a pilgrimage I had to make. Naturally - being a student of curiosity - I began to research and look for ways to make Ghana a possibility for me. Fortunately, almost immediately, I began to see opportunity after opportunity to join in on Afrochella and Year Of Return celebrations taking place in Ghana in December 2019.
Challenge Accepted.
The Trip
I joined some interest groups and tried to psyche myself up for whatever the cost of the trip would be. I knew it’d be irresponsible, financially, to even go. Then the pricing and payment plans were announced and I hopped on to Gravel World Travel’s Ghana itinerary.
The trip turned out to not be too financially irresponsible for me. I mean, unless you count the bills that I have been paying after the due date 😅.
The only “difficult” part of the trip for me was hindsight. I should have been buying things from the day I made the first payment! Other things, I wouldn’t have even known to be prepared for prior to actually hopping on/off the flight.
Lessons Learned From my First International Trip.
As this was my first international trip, and because I was going to be by myself, I planned to not drink. This did not stand as something that could potentially ruin the trip for me. Not that there's anything wrong with drinking every here and there, but I paid to see Ghana and not be hungover or sleepy (drinking make me sleep HARD...or drink more).
Lesson 1 - pack at least 3 outfits per day and regardless of how hot or cold it may be, always have at least 2 complete opposite weather outfits (or the parts ie. tee, jeans, a jacket, sweats)
For me, this is the funniest lesson, and it began a little over 2 weeks before the trip. Closed mouths don’t get fed and if something is weird ASK. In the group chat, I kept seeing mention of packing and couldn’t understand why anyone could/would pack so far in advance. Yes, I planned and packed outfits via a spreadsheet. I supremely packed my two carry-on bags and was very VERY proud.
What I did not factor in was lounging, clubbing, weather or temperature changes, and anything else outside of the itinerary. I had exactly 10 outfits (8 days and 2 options). Yes, Gravel provided a list of suggestions. Yes, I read it and made notes. Yes, I also forgot to transfer those things to my packing spreadsheet. Flying back, my overnight layover was in Ethiopia...and it was cold. It was also equally as cold when I landed back in Houston. Two days in a sundress and sandals, walking amongst all the people with better sense in their warm clothes, tickled my spirit. My freezing cold spirit.
Lesson 2 - Myself is always good enough. This self-imposed stress took up energy that I could’ve put into another, ANY other part of prepping to takeoff.
Wardrobe decisions stressed me. Eczema was on 155% the last 3-4 days before the trip. My scalp and skin were HAYWIRE. I also ordered plentiful outfits, but then decided that the fabric was too heavy for the heat I was expecting, so I was rushing to find summer clothes in December.
Hair is stressful, and worrying about small things can cause me to miss the joy in other things. For months I went back and forth in my head about what I’d do to it for the trip. I shouldn’t have. If I do not have my sisterlocks by the time I go on another trip (also, if I do) I’m not doing anything special to it. My fro, twist outs, and blowouts are usually the stuff people dream of.
I didn’t take makeup because I predicted and avoided that melting chocolate stress. That was the only good “how am I going to look” decision, that I made about this trip. Because seriously, I’m gone be bomb no matter what. 🤷🏾♀️💁🏾♀️
Lesson 3 - Let ish go. I am consistent when it comes to trying to figure out the why of every association that I make and then trying to ensure that I did not miss anything.
Sometimes we meet people, as a transition. Nothing more. Nothing less. I honestly believe that everyone we meet will be a life lesson. Some of those lessons will end with a test, and some will just need verification that you’ve completed the course (Check yes or no to verify you have received/reviewed the materials). And I am okay with that.
Tribe
Included in my trip package was a Ghanian naming ceremony. I was already excited about every last excursion planned but this took the cake.
Driving out to the Manya Jorpanya village was surreal. I could feel that everyone on our bus was excited with anticipation. Once we arrived at the village, our soon to be new family greeted us and directed us to our seats. We watched as the Chief, his family, and the leaders marched to their seats and then the ceremony officially began. There was a lovely ceremony, much like a church service. Then ceremonial singing and dancing.
Then we received our names.
This one moment, in my 33 years as a member of the diaspora, took the cake. I wouldn’t say it gave me a sense of belonging because from the minute I stepped off of the plane and saw the sea of blackness welcoming me...I felt at home.
Years of African American, Black, or American debates were settled upon that first step. They were settled by my DNA test. They were accepted at the naming ceremony. HOW am I African American? I - Afia Akweley, Friday oldest twin girl - belong to the Manya Tribe of Jorpanya - Shai State, Accra. Afia physically has a home. I have a (new) family. I have an answer.
Hakuna Matata
There are more lessons from this trip than I have the concentration to write about. One of the bigger ones, for me, was to calm down. There are things beyond our control, and we can either let them take over the journey OR we can carry on and make a mental note to try and best prevent these roadblocks going forward.
My usual self would’ve fallen apart at not being prepared for the daily events. I would panic at not being overdressed or over-prepared for all events or the severely broken nail from falling up the stairs that continued to plague me for the rest of the trip. However, if I took the time to celebrate all of the things that didn’t go how I wanted, I would not have had time to enjoy the things that made the trip great.
In closing, I leave all the cliché phrases I can recall - Hakuna Matata. Carpe diem. Que sera sera. YOLO. Laissez les bon temps rouler. Living my best life. Literally, any saying that promotes living in the moment can go here. I learned to better accept and live through them on this trip. I cannot wait for my next visit home.
